30 Things You Should Stop Doing Yourself

As Mary Robinson once said: "No one can go back and start over, but anyone can start today and make a new ending." Nothing could be closer to the truth. But before you can start this transformation process you have to stop doing the things that have been holding you back.

1. Stop wasting time with the wrong people.

Life is too short to spend time with people who take away happiness. If someone wants you in their life, they will make space for you. You should not have to fight for a place. Never, never insist on someone who constantly overlooks your value. And remember, it is not the people who are at your side at your best, but those who are by your side at your worst moment, your true friends. As J.F. Kennedy: "Success has many parents, but failure is an orphan."

2. Stop running away from your problems.

Face them with your head held high. No, it will not be easy. There is no person in the world capable of perfectly handling every blow they throw at him. We are not supposed to be able to solve problems instantly. This is not how we are made. In fact, we are made to get angry, sad, feel pain, stumble and fall. Because that is the whole purpose of life - face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over time. This is what ultimately makes us the person we will become.

3. Stop lying to yourself.

You can lie to anyone in the world, but you can not lie to yourself. Our lives improve only when we take opportunities, and the first and most difficult opportunity we can take is to be honest with ourselves.

4. Stop putting your own needs in the background.

The most painful thing is to lose yourself in the process of loving someone too much (your partner, your parents, your children, your siblings), and forget that you are also special. Yes, help others, but help yourself too. If there was ever a time to follow your passion and do something that you care about, that moment is now.

5. Stop trying to be someone you are not.

One of the biggest challenges in life is to be yourself in a world that is trying to make you all equal. There will always be someone more beautiful, there will always be someone smarter, there will always be someone younger, but it will never be you. Do not change to like people. Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.

6. Stop clinging to the past.

You can not start the next chapter of your life if you keep rereading the last one.

7. Stop being afraid to make a mistake.

Doing something and doing it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing anything. Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading to success. You end up regretting the things you did not do much more than the things you did.

8. Stop berating yourself for the mistakes of the past.

You can love the wrong person and cry for the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are perfect for us. We all make mistakes, we have struggles, and we even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future. Everything that has happened in your life is preparing you for a time that is to come.

9. Stop trying to buy happiness.

Many of the things we want are expensive. But the truth is that the things that really satisfy us are totally free love, laughter and work in our passions.

10. Stop looking exclusively at others to be happy.

If you are not happy with what you are inside, you will not be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone. You have to create stability in your own life before you can share it with someone else.

11. Stop being inactive.

Do not think too much or you will create a problem that was not even there in the first place. Evaluate situations and take decisive action. You can not change what you refuse to confront. Moving forward implies a risk. Point! You can not get to second base with your foot in the first.

12. Stop thinking you're not ready.

Nobody feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises. The greatest opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means that we will not feel totally comfortable at the beginning.

13. Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons.

Relationships should be chosen with caution. It is better to be alone than to be badly accompanied. There is no need to rush. And this can be transferred to any type of relationship, be it personal, work or professional. If there is something that it is meant to be, it will happen - at the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you're ready, not when you're alone.

14. Stop rejecting new relationships just because the old ones did not work.

In life you will realize that there is a purpose for everyone you know. Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you. But most importantly, some get the best out of you.

15. Stop trying to compete against everyone else.

Do not worry about what others do better than you. Concentrate on overcoming your own records every day. Success is a battle between you and yourself only.

16. Stop being jealous of others.

Jealousy is the art of counting the blessings of another person instead of your own. Ask yourself the following: "What is something that I have and that everyone else wants?"

17. Stop complaining and feel sorry for yourself.

The curves of life exist for a reason - to change your trajectory in a direction that is meant for you. You can not see or understand everything that happens in a moment, and it can be difficult. However, reflect on the negative curves thrown at you in the past. You will often see that over time they took you to a better place, person, mood or situation. So smile! Let everyone know that today you are much stronger than yesterday, and you will be.

18. Stop holding grudges.

Do not live your life with hatred in your heart. You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate. Forgiveness is not saying, "What they did to me is fine." Is saying, "I'm not going to let what you did to ruin my happiness forever." Forgiveness is the answer ... let go, find peace, free yourself. And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it's for you too. If you must forgive yourself, go ahead and try to do better next time.

19. Stop letting others lower you to their level.

Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise their own.

20. Stop wasting time explaining to others.

Your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe anyway. Just do what you know in your heart that is right.

21. Stop doing the same things over and over again without rest.

The time to take a deep breath is when you do not have time for it. If you keep doing what you are doing, you will continue to achieve what you are receiving. Sometimes it is necessary to take distance to see things clearly.

22. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments.

Enjoy the little things, because one day you can look back and discover that they were big things. The best part of your life will be the small moments, those that you spend laughing with someone you care about.

23. Stop trying to do things perfectly.

The real world does not reward perfectionists, it rewards people who manage to finish things.

24. Stop following the path of least resistance.

Life is not easy, especially when you think about achieving something worthwhile. Do not take the easy way. Do something extraordinary.

25. Stop acting as if everything is fine if it is not.

It's okay to fall apart for a while. You do not always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well. You do not have to worry about what others think. Cry if necessary - it is healthy to shed your tears. The sooner you do it, the sooner you will be able to smile again.

26. Stop blaming others for your problems.

The extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life. By blaming others for what is happening, you deny your responsibility - you give others power over that part of your life.

27. Stop trying to be everything for everyone.

Doing so is impossible and when you try it you will only burn yourself. However, making a person smile can change the world. Maybe not to everyone, but to their world. So fine tune your goal.

28. Stop worrying so much.

Worrying will not free you from the burdens of tomorrow, but will take you away from the joy you have today. One way to check if there is something worth thinking about is to ask yourself the following question: "Will this matter matter in a year? Three years? Five years?". If not, then it's not worth worrying about.

29. Stop focusing on what you do not want to happen.

Concentrate on what you do want to happen. Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story. If you wake up every morning with the idea that something wonderful is going to happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you will often find that you are right.

30. Stop being ungrateful.

No matter how good or bad you spend it, wake up every day grateful for your life. Someone else somewhere is fighting desperately for theirs. Instead of thinking about what you are missing, try to think of everything you have that others are missing.

Written by Cristian Illanes -